Avoid anyone who cares little about the feelings of others, is easily frustrated, aggressive and never feels guilty about anything
Your new squeeze is so lovely you’re wondering whether they might even be ‘the one.’ In fact, it’s impossible to know that for sure, but you can definitely identify the ones who aren’t.
And if you quickly eliminate everyone who is bad news, then you’ll have a very happy love life. But how do you figure that out? Well for a start, being in love’s got nothing to do with it!
Because you can fall deeply in love with someone who will eventually make your life miserable. So leave all those romantic feelings aside. The things that tell you’re with the wrong person are all thoroughly practical.
Start by asking whether you have similar backgrounds, beliefs, lifestyles and looks. There are successful couples who don’t, but they are few and far between.
Avoid anyone who’s not making their way in the world. Or is financially inept. Do they get along with their family? Do they have an adult relationship with their mother? Do they have a sense of humour?
Avoid anyone who has no friends. And don’t stay with someone thinking you can change them. People stay the same as a relationship develops, only more so.
Are you with a good human being? Someone who’s kind, supportive, honest and forgiving? Or someone who lies, or is endlessly envious, secretive, or just plain weird?
Like someone who’s convinced that everyone’s after them, even when they’re obviously not. Or who is emotional and impulsive. Or who cares little about the feelings of others, is easily frustrated, aggressive and never feels guilty about anything. Or who can’t control their emotions. Charming most of the time, but exploding into rage over something completely trivial.
Avoid anyone who over-dramatises events and has strong and unstable emotions. Who focuses a lot on their appearance and is forever flirting. They might seem exciting and passionate to begin with, but can really make you really miserable when things don’t go their way.
Then there are the people who think they’re better than everyone else, who dream of success and crave attention, but show little in return. They can be charismatic and fun when you first meet, but usually end up trying to dominate you. They’re also unfaithful, cold and unavailable.
There are people who are forever anxious. Perhaps rigid, judgemental and sensitive to criticism. Or maybe tense, insecure and always needing to be liked. Or passive. Relying on others to make their decisions for them and finding it hard to cope with everyday life.
People who have unusual character traits can often seem very attractive to begin with, only to cause you endless distress as the years go by. And they rarely tackle their issues. So it’s a good idea to watch for anyone whose behaviour is at all weird, and let them go quickly!
Get the idea? Stop worrying about whether your new date might be ‘the one’. Just be certain they’re not someone you should avoid.